The way home

My students wrote exams today and what I should be doing is some serious power-marking, but I would like to share some thoughts first. I am really proud of these young people, they have made marked progress this semester, and I am happy to send them on to foundation year.

Yesterday I visited one of my favourite places in Oman with my dearest one. It is a sweet mountain village near Al Hamra called Misfat Abreen. We had slept badly the night before and then we almost missed the turn off and on our way up the mountain he asked, 'So what is the story of this place?'' I was a bit stumped at first, doubting myself a little and wondering if this was good timing for us to visit.
Why do I like this place so much? I know quite a few of you have visited there with me. It is beautiful, tranquil, lush and it clings to the side of a steep hill. The friendly locals allow the tourists to come into their village,yet the atmosphere is peaceful and calm. We were fortunate yesterday morning, there was nobody there. We walked around admiring the fruit trees- tall papaya trees, hardy tiny fig trees growing out of cracks in the rock, towering gnarled trees filled with mangoes, banana trees with fruit like giants' fingers; but for me the most  irresistable and majestic will always be the towering palms laden with dates- green, yellow and red.

We followed a lovely little path around the village and walked on a small wall by the side of a falaj, a narrow irrigation channel. I was walking along there enjoying myself looking at the sights and looking closely at the variety of trees with the loved one, when I had a sudden memory flash back. The previous time I was there, I had been nervous to walk on that wall beside the falaj and remember being unsure, a bit wobbly on my feet and constantly vigilant.

It feels to me as though in the last year, my stability has improved, the roots that tie me to this earth, and draw energy from it, have grown stronger; my feet have learnt to trust the trail more, to cherish it.  Isn't the journey about the path in any case, and not about the destination?

It was a good realisation, that on every level I am feeling more balanced. It has been a slow and gradual process, and my patience has paid off. I have been catching myself in my reactions, thinking more before I speak and living a deep state of feeling blessed. I am truly a lucky girl!

Tonight I pray dear friends, that the mysteries of the path reveal themselves kindly, and that your sturdy lamp lights your way home, always home.

Detours to the rainbow's end

You may remember me writing about doing some haiku with my students a while ago. Sometimes it is good to break away from report writing and academic reading and coax them in a different direction. I am a person that has come to appreciate the detours in life, and there is often much to be discovered on those unexpected turnings down the side roads. I am sorting through my papers at the moment and yesterday I came across a few of these poems that my students wrote, and my colleague suggested I posted this one here.

When I hear the opera sound
and see the bag of rainbow color
at the end I know it's Stefani :)

So, fellow traveller, allow yourself the time to take a few detours, you might find they lead you to the magic at the rainbow's end!

If it be your will

As most of you know, Leonard Cohen has been an inspiration, comfort and joy to me most of my life. I have had this beautiful song of his in my mind the last couple of days and would like to share it with you. I am permeated with a deep gratitude for all the miracles and love in my life and the music is so much part of it. Deep bow to Leonard. My mantra today is: Beauty beauty beauty!
What is yours?

If it be your will
That I speak no more
And my voice be still
As it was before
I will speak no more
I shall abide until
I am spoken for
If it be your will
If it be your will
That a voice be true
From this broken hill
I will sing to you
From this broken hill
All your praises they shall ring
If it be your will
To let me sing
From this broken hill
All your praises they shall ring
If it be your will
To let me sing If it be your will
If there is a choice
Let the rivers fill
Let the hills rejoice
Let your mercy spill
On all these burning hearts in hell
If it be your will
To make us well And draw us near
And bind us tight
All your children here
In their rags of light
In our rags of light
All dressed to kill
And end this night
If it be your will

If it be your will.

Night swimming

 The temperature here is Muscat has hit mid-forties Celsius but the humidity is still bearable and the die-hards( including me of course!) at the university are still having lunch outside. I came home from my German class tonight, and sat outside having a glass of bubbly and pondering the last few days. The rose moon of June is magnificent and I look forward to doing some nightswimming with the loved one under the full moon tomorrow. How romantic can one get :)

The sea is just amazing at the moment. On both the evenings of the weekend, we went down at sunset time and just luxuriated in the water. It is the perfect temperature.
 There were some families on the beach and also a couple of little pockets of children in the water, who soon disappeared at the call to prayer and the promise of food. After that it was just us, the shadows of the fishing boats on the sand, the watchful moon and the winking street lamps coming on, casting their rippling lights over the gently moving water. Oh, I mustn't forget the surprise of  little schools of fish jumping, and the odd turtle bobbing up for air.

There is a time when the sky and the sea are both almost white and ethereal, and we feel like the only people in the world.

As I lay drifting in the water losing myself in the sky, I remembered the story of Jesus healing the lame man at the pool of Bethesda.
It was the sermon preached on the day I described in my entry, 'a trick of light'. I have been thinking of it a lot since then. That paralysed man had been unable to walk for 38 years, and anyone would have thought it was obvious that he would want to get better; yet Jesus asks him,' Do you want to be well?'

Why does Jesus ask him this? This is how I see it. Because for anyone of us to change, heal and move towards our highest and best selves, we have to be seriously willing. Or as my healer mother used to say,'Willing and desperate!'. Many of us are addicted to our own destructive ways, negative though patterns, the thinking  that lead us to fall into the same hole again and again eventhough we know better. We don't want to let go of the physical ailments that earn us sympathy and time and care from our colleagues, friends and family.

We have to give ourselves permission to evolve and let go and break the moulds we have set through years of habit and conditioning. I often ask myself why we hold onto these things that do not serve us. Fear of the unknown I guess, just part of our challenge of being human.

I lay floating in the sea, which held me like a safe hammock, and whispered to the sky, yes, yes, yes. I want to be well. I want all to be well. And I realised that in saying those words, it was already a reality.